*With a swish and a flick, behold a magic trick
The Narcissist
D!
Yours truly. 17. Female. Malaysian. Petite. 27th MAY. Single. Maybe available *hinthint* NEWS is her only drug. Absolutely, magically in love with BEAST. Hey! Say! JUMP. SHINee. Super Junior. In that order. Assuntarian. A Harry Potter Twitter Role-Player. Compulsive writer. Lusting for a glance in her direction. Sings like the world is deaf. As genuine as you can get. A self-proclaimed narcissist. Enjoys not having the other half
Love me? Hate me? I'll still be me. Enjoy. Lyn|Avery
Books Pave the Way to Destruction Yet to A Beauty Beyond Imaginations
Her Domain
286 posts from 5 June 2011
Escaping the conforms of society
To stupefy the endless expanse of the universe
Advancing into a world unknown
Please don't RIP Ask permission.
Discover where else she speaks her mind
Twitter: @theivorykeys
Facebook: Shern Lyn Khuan
Email: Contact either TorFB for details. (;
Her Cravings
• To be any JE member's adopted sister
• My first book published
• To meet NewS
• To meet Hey!Say!JUMP
• To meet Super Junior
• To meet SHINee
• To get signed to SM Entertainment
• A degree in English
• Black skinnies (:
•
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• Japanese boy uniform
• To perform a JE song medley
• To perform in Tokyo Dome and get signed to JE
• Another trip to Japan
• Permanent Japanese residence
• A yukata
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• To cosplay
• My first perfect Japanese bento lunch
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• Understand and speak fluent Japanese
• Understand and speak fluent Korean
• National status as a writer
• A laptop or something similar
Will be updated when fancy strikes
Her One True Loves
MY BRATs TEAM. Alor Star 2011 NewS (Lots of love). Hey! Say! JUMP. Masuda Takahisa. Kato Shigeaki. Pen. Paper. Trees. Yamashita Tomohisa SHINee 3A12009. Super Junior. Nakajima Yuuto. Mathematics. Window shopping. Tegoshi Yuya. Japan! Twilight and Dusk. Kim Jong-Woon Sunset. Beaches. Rain. Stars. Inspiration. Koyama Keiichiro. Colours. Winter. Snow. Winter jackets. Nishikido Ryo.
Runaway
Infatuated<3Unofficial HSJ Malaysia LJ
abelchi| amandang/doldol | amylim | annatan | ashleykhor | ben-jielim | chuachiyan | cynthiaong | dariusbehyunji<3 | eelainetan | eeleng | euniceho | huichee | honpaige | horsegirl15 | jadeyeap<3 | kin-chan<3 | lydiaong | marcusheng | miki-chan<3 | nicolefong | nicolemarcus | previta | samuellee
Ramblings&Memories
A few words would be nice. :D
By post:
feeling helpless
being strong
Hatred Is Not Only A Feeling
To Shed Or Not To Shed
Can It Be Called Love?
When You Fall, Fall With Grace
Is It Called Self Abuse?
The Words of a Man in Love
Of Headaches and Departures
wow
By month:
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
October 2011
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Sunday, January 31, 2010 @ 1:28 AM
welcome to addiction; all over againFunny, despite the fact that I've hated KPop for as long as I can remember... It takes a lot of my pride and ego to admit that I've fallen madly and deeply in love with the one and only Super Junior. I used to be quite okay with DBSK and hated SuJu but then, Neorago (It's You) made me fall in love with Super Junior. And, I've fallen deeply and madly in love with KyuHyun from the very first moment I saw the drama version of Neorago. So, now, as well as squealing over NewS and Hey! Say! JUMP, I squeal for Super Junior as well. Though I may not call myself as an E.L.F. (Ever Lasting Friend), I still take pride in having fallen in love with Super Junior. I cannot count the amount of times I've sat in front of the computer and watched every performance of Neorago there is on Youtube and how many times I've squealed over KyuHyun, DongHae, EunHyuk, YeSung and Wookie. (I would say KiBum but he doesn't appear in lives a lot. Gah!) Yes, I cannot choose between these lovables but I can tell you that KyuHyun ultimately tops my list. But no one can ever top NewS. They'll be my babyies for life and nothing can break me of my love for these boys full of pure and uncensored member ai. So, goes to say, I'm definitely going for the Super Junior concert come 20th of March despite the concert being two days before the stuuupid first term exam. What a bummer right? But, I'm not telling my mom about it yet... I want to be able to go for their concert. It is extremely vital as I bet that this is the only time they will ever come down for a proper concert instead of being here for some event. So! MustgoMustgoMustgo. And I pray they have awesome merchandise there since I've no idea what they sell at SMEntertaiment concerts. I only know what they sell at JE concerts. If anyone knows, do tell me so I can plan. And yes, I'm getting my NewS and Hey! Say! JUMP calendars soon. Anyone going for SuJu's concert, drop me a message and we'll meet, yeah? Muchloveandappreciation, Lynxoxo ~KyuHyun FTW!~
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Thursday, January 28, 2010 @ 4:06 AM
don't ask; a little hurt insideI guess that many of you will be able to guess as to why I hurt on the inside. It's a real silly reason, really but I won't voice it out. Let's say it's linked to squealing-ness and jumping like a mad fool. See the connection yet? No? That's your problem. I'm not going to directly state why I hurt. It'll make myself feel rather stupid. I feel like crying but I don't feel that it's a very valid reason to shed my tears on. I'm wanting to see if I might be able to persuade the head honcho to allow me to be a part of it...if SHE wants to go ask that we get it. I was told that SHE wanted to do it but I'm not too sure now. My mom said to ask early so that we might get a guaranteed place. And what's more, I feel so extremely betrayed. This is something I won't explain. It's something that if I told to the world, it'll make me seem like a spoilt. Lemme hope the opportunity comes for me next year. We'll see how it goes and if we can ask to be a part of it. Depends also on whether SHE is willing to tag along and be part of it. Just a presence...I don't know her. She seems to be slightly different nowadays. And what more...it's guaranteed that two classes will be...so we might not be a part of it either since the class is like pure eighty something people added together. I feel like shedding tears. It seriously hurts so bad. I've been waiting forever for this. I guess most people have. And a spoilt brat class wants to mogok. Whatever, silly class. And in case you haven't figured it yet, it has something to do with words that begin with the letter N and J. Go figure. |
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Thursday, January 21, 2010 @ 3:43 AM
three years of everlastingness and more to come Happy Birthday to Korean-obsessed Sue Lynn!
The one whom I love the most out of all the six of us. The one who never fails to cheer me up just with a blurr look. The one who listened and never criticised. The one who opened her heart and let us in. The one who borrows my books. The one whom I introduced to Twilight. The one who fangirl-ed with me over it and then hated it together. The one I would accompany to the end of the world if it was even just a wild goose chase. The one I've known and shared a strong friendship for three years. Hey, Miss Mah. You're finally sixteen and growing older. You're the oldest out of all of us and should be the mommy yet Shu Han and I have to mommy you. Despite being sixteen, we still love you the same. When I first met you...I can't even remember how we met. I know I only grew close to you because of Cheryl and Laura. And then we grew closer in Form 2 when we decided to sit together. And then we formed the six of us in Form 3. We've been thrown into different classes yet the bond is still there. Hoping it will never falter, woman because we're supposed to grow old together and my kids are supposed to walk pass your office and ask to visit Aunty Sue Lynn but I will tell them that unless you want to be examined, you kids do not visit Aunty Sue Lynn during office hours. We Love You despite your numerous faults because each of us has our own. ;p So, Happy Birthday, dearest darling. We'll always be here for you as you grow old, lose teeth, grow white hair and grow senile. =) Because we all will still be crazy when we're old. From the one who will never love you less. =) Lyn |
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Friday, January 15, 2010 @ 8:43 PM
no longer stupid; i trusted you but not anymoreI said that I would post this sometime once I got over You. Well, I've finally gotten over You and here's the promised post. I'm not sure if it'll be long or short. Read at your own risk? Coming to apologize to me and admit that You had feelings for her won't change whatever had happened between us. I've finally accepted that all of it is a giant lie. Unfortunately, You didn't appreciate the intimacy and care that I had to offer and You just dumped me aside, playing with me when You knew that it would hurt me. Well, You've just lost a lot of what I have to offer and it'll never be given back. Even apologizing now, I don't see any sincerity in it. You were just extremely stuupid. You just wanted to see how it would be for a girl to return Your 'love', eh? I won't accept Your apology. Live with the guilt that You ruined a nice little fifteen year old girl. Live with the fact that You can be so heartless. Yet, I doubt You'd even bother to remember about me after this. And You call yourself a Christian. If You never had any feelings for me, You should have said so from the start instead of leading me on. I can never erase these things but they can be shoved to the back of my mind where it will stay in the little forgotten crevice admist many other happier memories. After all, You're so not worth my time. I seriously hate You now, you know. I never thought I would hate someone just for breaking my heart but unfortunately, I seriously hate You. After all that intimacy, You can still be cold and aloof to me the next day. Shows how much emotion You have for someone who has given her Your heart. And all this while of having sweet-talked me, You just wanted to see if she loves You. Just so You know, You're chasing an empty dream. She's already partnered with someone and she loves him. You're stuuupid for liking someone who's already been possessed. Lusting for another man's possession? Well, we're humans. And just so You know, she'll like you as nothing more than a friend. So, give up and stop dreaming. Thinking back, I wonder how I could have fallen for you. Thinking back, I now realise that You are a freeking male chavunist and a freeking dominator. In love, there's no equality for You. Thinking back, I realised that You had been trying to dominate me and I hoped that you failed for I'm not some weak-minded woman. As far as I know, my greatest asset is my brain and I'm proud of being smart. If You can't clean up Your act and practice self-restraint, You're never going anywhere in life. You're rude and extremely insufferable. You hurt tons of people around You but You don't realise. J didn't deserve Your wrath back at camp. You made him the way he was. That, I now realise. Live with that. And a God-fearing Christian wouldn't have done what You did to me. Live with that thought too. Saying that I was right and You were wrong and that You really did have feelings for her really makes me want to laugh. What use is there telling me now? As I said, I betrayed my own heart and my rules for You yet did You prove anything to me? You failed that test. I was stuupid. I admit. And the way You speak to me. As if I'm dim-witted. What I first met You, the way You spoke about things made me think that You were rather intellectual. Unfortunately, A found you arrogant and a boaster. I didn't see that. I thought it was smart of You to have debated with me. I liked someone with knowledge. Looking back, I guess I had been blind with amazement. A was right. You are arrogant and a boaster. I guess that's why I hate speaking to you. I'm not some dim-witted female who is going to agree with whatever You say. I'm not submissive. Keep that in mind. If you want some blonde female who can't think for herself, then go ahead. If You'd really gotten to know me, You'd have known that when I get angry/frustrated, my mouth becomes really sharp. Unfortunately, You never bothered to get to know me. You just wanted me because I was 'cheap' in Your words, yes? Well, F.Y.I., You can't kiss for peanuts and Your mouth is the grossest thing in the world. Wet kisses are sloppy, disgusting and unprofessional. Get a life before chasing a female. You know zero about wooing a female. Grow up and develop some balls. Immature males like You are a real disgrace to the male race. I know males who are way more beautiful on the inside and outside than You are and they don't use either to take advantage of a genteel heart of a female. Be a gentleman and grow up. Dressing formally and being in the top class doesn't instantly make You smart nor does it erase Your past mistakes. And being in the top class just because You want to be on par with me shows Your desperation. With 4As and an attitude like Yours, don't dream that you'll be successful in Science class. You're better off where You're orginally put. Having four As is not the issue, it's Your attitude. And having a brain counts for something. Women love brains and You have zero. Intellect is something prized and yet You don't appreciate it and hone it. I don't care if Your parents threw you out whatsoever or Your grandmother died. That is no excuse for not studying or being a good person. Poorer people have achieved much more in life and you with a nice house in a heavily guarded area can't even make use of what You have been given, You don't deserve it. And I seriously think You lied to me about NewS. Oh well. I gave up trusting You a long time ago. You didn't appreciate my trust so You're not going to get it. You took it and trampled on it. I hate You. I hate You to the bottom of my guts. So, now, to pay back for my carelessness, You're going to go into my book. And yes, You're going to be the villian. After what You did, I think You deserved it. So, be happy that I made You part of my life and my novel. It is going to be epic. So, You'd better watch out, W. I'm not someone you can mess with and get away with it. I might bawl and make a huge fuss at first but my brain is crude and shrewd in ways You can't imagine. It's sharp and poisonous. Don't forget. I'll always be watching. For when You're at your weakest and that's when I'll strike. You think that I'm a weak-willed woman. Well, wait and see. I'll get You so bad that You'd wish You had never laid eyes on me. You'll be sorry You ever decided to play with me. Muchloveandappreciation,
Lynxoxo |
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Sunday, January 10, 2010 @ 2:04 AM
a flair for words; an advertisement of sortsTwo Hey! Say! JUMP fics. Written really recently. They've been published on LiveJournal. You don't have to know Hey! Say! JUMP to read my fics. Just putting it up here in case anyone's interested in reading. One's a Yuto/OC fiction and another is JUMP/OCs fiction. Enjoy, ne, minna? Btw, theivorykeys is my LJ username. =) A Forbidden Rhapsody Title: A Forbidden Rhapsody Author: theivorykeys Fandom: Hey! Say! JUMP Pairing: Nakajima Yuto/OC Genre: Romance, Fantasy, Suspense, Adventure Rating: PG-13 (For language and fight scenes) Disclaimer: Type: Multi-chapter Summary: Elementals are all male. An strange incident on New Year's Day leads to a discovery of a strong-willed, hard-headed, orphaned and adopted female Elemental. Her Element is unique and the only one to have ever existed. Yet, the person she's destined to be with is the only person who cannot touch her. Nakajima Yuto is drawn instantly but he has no idea why. Sparks fly and one wonders if they have been destined by the stars. Chapter 1: It's just a normal reaction to a pretty boy, I told myself. Chapter 2: "In a way, you're saying that I'm pretty?" Chapter 3:It didn't at all speak of a bond of romance. Fabrications of a Music Video Title: Fabrications of a Music Video Author: theivorykeys Fandom: Hey! Say! JUMP Pairing: NakajimaYuto/OC, YamadaRyosuke/OC, ChinenYuuri/OC, OkamotoKeito/OC, MorimotoRyutaro/OC, AriokaDaiki/OC, InooKei/OC, YaotomeHikaru/OC, TakakiYuya/OC, YabuKato/OC Rating: PG (For language) Disclaimer: I claim Type: Multi-chapter Summary: No one knows who they really are. Some say they are just Shadows. Even the Hey! Say! JUMP boys have heard of the legendary Shadows who seem to make the headlines all these days. And even they would give a chance to just get a glimpse of these legends. Little did they know that they would when their lives are slowly being threathened one by one and what they discover about the Shadows is rather surprising. Prologue: Glitter coated their clothing Chapter 1:"You guys take out people like lightning strikes." Do take a look and drop your comments here if you don't have an LJ. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo |
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Friday, January 8, 2010 @ 8:47 PM
my table says donghae in a corner; new beginningIt's officially the end of the week. I guess it's time that I blogged about school. =) Just to give my blog some life. The first week's came and left in the blink of an eye. It moved extremely fast though at time it felt very slow. I've finally settled down in class 4 Science 5 and now, time to begin the treacherous thing called Homework. Because of this Homework, I don't have time to write and I need to get the fanfic up as quick as possible before the idea flies from my mind. Oh well, it was going so well though. Well, my class is a whole giant mixture from A1 all the way to M4. The people there aren't bad. At least not yet. Class photos will never be the same again without you guys. =) Neither will fangirling. First week and I've already got tons of homework. For Accounts, at least. The rest of the homework hasn't begun piling up yet. And I can't believe we have Malays teaching us Moral. Gah! They don't even take the subject and they're getting Malay teachers to lecture us in Moral. No wonder I'm falling asleep. Not to mention my B.Melayu teacher. Each time she speaks, I begin to fall asleep. I need to stay awake. And btw, I'm sick once more. I never recovered. I've always has tiny little coughs but then the cold came back and now I'm sniffling and all. It's so annoying on the first week of school. I keep wanting to fall asleep. And the paper is shooo tough. I'm sure I'll fail B.Melayu the first term. How the hell do you expect me to know my peribahasa's when you barely teach them in school? Whatever you teach is the same goddamned thing I've been learning since Form1. Hell no, since primary school Kata Nama Am, Kata Nama Khas etc. It's the same things furthur more. No new syllables in the chapter. Stuuupid school. Remind me to finish my Sejarah notes and Accounts crap. Not to mention tuition work and I have Chemistry tuition on Monday and Add Maths on Sunday and Literature class on Tuesday. Phew. Hectic schedule. I only have Wednesday's and Fridays and Saturdays to complete homework. I've got piano class on Thursday. Not to mention that being sick saps my energy so I can't really stay awake for long. And, your truly is the freeking monitor for class 4 Science 5. Me and my big mouth volunteering to become the assistant. And since a teacher came in and asked for the monitor and we had none, they shoved me up to monitor and now Previta is the assistant. Gah! I think I should probably go running like a mad woman just to get some stuff off my mind and to indulge in some quality time with myself and this flabby body of mine. Hmm, you know, I didn't make resolutions this year. Off topic. And yes! The table I used to sit at had DongHae carved into the bottom right corner. Hilarious, eh? My sister's chair in Moral class had the whole of SuJu written on it. Cool, eh? I should leave my NewS mark there. I'm crapping again. Biology and Chemistry is going to be extremely tough since I'm so not used to doing my homework and I hate to do reports. Now, we have to draw diagrams and all that. I only hate the drawings part. Let's pray that Chemistry doesn't have drawings or I will die. The drawings and diagrams are the only reason I don't do my Science homework. The rest are getting on pretty okay. Till the time comes for me to do B.Melayu homework which I barely bother to do. ;p I'm going to force myself to and nap less in the afternoons. We've got homework to complete. See what I mean by having no time to myself? Friday nights are going to be extreme bliss since I'm giving myself some time then to relax. And guess what? I've finally decided to take the Shanghai holiday pictures from the camera and into the computer. But those are the ones from the Sony camera and not my Canon. ;p There's going to be a lot, then. =) I'll try uploading to FB. The last time I tried uploading, it jammed my whole computer. Gah! That's all for now. I'm still contemplating if I should do a post on a JE member each month just to liven up the blog a bit because I only get the chance to post once a week with homework and what not. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo ~Watching an OPV of NEWS' FLY AGAIN, I almost cried. Only NewS can make me cry D~
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Saturday, January 2, 2010 @ 6:50 AM
with confetti and ribbons; glitter and allNew Year's gone and come. Big deal about one day, right? Most people make a giant fuss about it but I've got no idea why. It's just another day to me. To some, it might hold alot of significance but to me, it's just another day. And, I ushered in the New Year by reading a book. What a lot of good it did to me. I wasted what could have been one of the best performances on TV. NHK's Japan Song Fest to usher in the New Year had Arashi and NYC Boys performing on it. Gah! I've seen Arashi in performance but I've seen so little of NYC Boys that I was quite upset I missed it. I had totally forgotten about it until it was past midnight and then, my sister told me. She herself had forgotten. Oh well. There's always next year. School begins in slighty more than 24 hours. It's frightening to begin school once more to appear to the same friends you've known for three years of your high school life only to be wrenched apart into the streaming of the classes. Safe to say, I already know mine so, the terror's just been building and building. I hate to be separated from the ones I love so. And furthurmore, my contanst source of reassurance to the skills of my writing is being wrenched to my side. Not to mention, my only source of fangirling eventhough sometimes it bounces off, at least she understands what the hell I'm saying. I wonder how I'm going to cope in a class who has not gotten used to me bursting into random Japanese songs at random moments. Neither has the class ever experienced the kind of noise that escapes these lips of mine. Neither have they ever experienced the fangirling that I'm so famous for. Sigh. I'll have to built my writing reputation once more. I used to be the writer of the class. Let's hope that no one unsurps my post at spinning stories out of nothing. Poetry, I don't care for but stories, yes. That is my strong point. I spin tales like a wildcat. I can pluck an idea out of thin air and spin wonderful tales out of it. Yes, I realise I'm conceited but I'm proud of this ability. I take pride in being able to do this. I feel all warm and fuzzy inside when someone tells me that my story is good. I've even received comments that my writing style was light and refreshing. It's these tiny things that make me feel loved. Makes a writer feel loved. I wonder if the class I'm in will see the abilities and accept me for being able to write and not badmouth me just because I get good English grades. And I'm so afraid that the people in the class will be the rowdy crowd and turn the class to hell. These are my little worries. I hope that I'll be able to bond with someone. Not bond in the way the five of us have. Just someone I'm able to talk to in class. I bet no one shares my same interests. Well, I'll just have to find out, won't I? I don't actually have much to say. Just want to liven the blog. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo |