*With a swish and a flick, behold a magic trick
The Narcissist
D!
Yours truly. 17. Female. Malaysian. Petite. 27th MAY. Single. Maybe available *hinthint* NEWS is her only drug. Absolutely, magically in love with BEAST. Hey! Say! JUMP. SHINee. Super Junior. In that order. Assuntarian. A Harry Potter Twitter Role-Player. Compulsive writer. Lusting for a glance in her direction. Sings like the world is deaf. As genuine as you can get. A self-proclaimed narcissist. Enjoys not having the other half
Love me? Hate me? I'll still be me. Enjoy. Lyn|Avery
Books Pave the Way to Destruction Yet to A Beauty Beyond Imaginations
Her Domain
286 posts from 5 June 2011
Escaping the conforms of society
To stupefy the endless expanse of the universe
Advancing into a world unknown
Please don't RIP Ask permission.
Discover where else she speaks her mind
Twitter: @theivorykeys
Facebook: Shern Lyn Khuan
Email: Contact either TorFB for details. (;
Her Cravings
• To be any JE member's adopted sister
• My first book published
• To meet NewS
• To meet Hey!Say!JUMP
• To meet Super Junior
• To meet SHINee
• To get signed to SM Entertainment
• A degree in English
• Black skinnies (:
•
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• Japanese boy uniform
• To perform a JE song medley
• To perform in Tokyo Dome and get signed to JE
• Another trip to Japan
• Permanent Japanese residence
• A yukata
•
• To cosplay
• My first perfect Japanese bento lunch
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• Understand and speak fluent Japanese
• Understand and speak fluent Korean
• National status as a writer
• A laptop or something similar
Will be updated when fancy strikes
Her One True Loves
MY BRATs TEAM. Alor Star 2011 NewS (Lots of love). Hey! Say! JUMP. Masuda Takahisa. Kato Shigeaki. Pen. Paper. Trees. Yamashita Tomohisa SHINee 3A12009. Super Junior. Nakajima Yuuto. Mathematics. Window shopping. Tegoshi Yuya. Japan! Twilight and Dusk. Kim Jong-Woon Sunset. Beaches. Rain. Stars. Inspiration. Koyama Keiichiro. Colours. Winter. Snow. Winter jackets. Nishikido Ryo.
Runaway
Infatuated<3Unofficial HSJ Malaysia LJ
abelchi| amandang/doldol | amylim | annatan | ashleykhor | ben-jielim | chuachiyan | cynthiaong | dariusbehyunji<3 | eelainetan | eeleng | euniceho | huichee | honpaige | horsegirl15 | jadeyeap<3 | kin-chan<3 | lydiaong | marcusheng | miki-chan<3 | nicolefong | nicolemarcus | previta | samuellee
Ramblings&Memories
A few words would be nice. :D
By post:
feeling helpless
being strong
Hatred Is Not Only A Feeling
To Shed Or Not To Shed
Can It Be Called Love?
When You Fall, Fall With Grace
Is It Called Self Abuse?
The Words of a Man in Love
Of Headaches and Departures
wow
By month:
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
October 2011
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Sunday, May 31, 2009 @ 9:45 AM
moving again; please do relinkTo all those whom I haven't sent messages to and are still using my old link, please do link this new blog. Once more, its: Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo
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@ 8:05 AM
growing pains; the evidence clearly seenIf only time would slow so we could all enjoy life as it truly should Yet, I could barely enjoy it as it really should be enjoyed. It was a fast moving show and as I said, entertaining Yet, there was something in me that didn't really grasp the moment. When I should have laughed, I didn't But when the whole cinema was quiet, I laughed at the subtle meanings in the words that no one else saw. Could it be that we are growing up so fast that we can barely enjoy the things that we used to when we were little? I used to love these animated movies. Whenever Monsters Inc. or The Incredibles show on Disney Channel, I would fight to watch it and I still laugh at it no matter what. Then why couldn't I enjoy Monsters vs Aliens like I am supposed to? Is it because the story is too simple and predictable and the animators didn't do a very good job with it? Is it because the older animated shows have better story quality than the newer ones? Is it because I prefer the oldies which I grew up with to the newbies? I can't really put my finger on it. People say that at my age, watching Monsters vs Aliens is "lame" and "childish" but I don't really see that. The show was not to say hilarious but with good moral values which animated movies usually try to portray through their characters. When I heard that Monsters vs Aliens came out, I desperately wanted to see it. And now that I have, it didn't strike me as awesome. But neither was it booooring. It was mediocre. I wasn't fantastic but neither did it bore me to death. Maybe it's because I am growing up and these shows don't really strike fancy anymore. But then why? Do I want to see the Hannah Montana movie so badly? Okay, maybe because it's like the "new" thing. But then why would I want to see Ice Age 3: Rise of the Dinosaurs. But well, I think my discomfort in watching Monsters vs Aliens could be due to the 3D glasses which after staring through them for approximately an hour and a half, it gave me headache. Without the glasses would be better but then you'll be seeing double images. I really can't put my finger on it. These days, you don't really find teenagers enjoying their childhood like they should. We're not adults but neither are we children But the age that we are in is still classified under childhood. Most of us grow up extremely fast due to parental pressure and also the traits that we were born with. We just don't slow down. It's nowadays hard for me to find someone at the age of fourteen going on fifteen or fifteen who enjoys watching Phineas and Ferb, Ben 10 or even those shows on the Disney Preschool Channel. Hell, I still enjoy Barney and Friends. There aren't many teenagers nowadays who enjoy good cartoons. Goes to show that we grow up to fast. Maybe we should slow down and sniff the roses. Childhood isn't forever. It's only eighteen years of your life. But adulthood is approximately up till the age of 45+- Live your childhood as it should be. It was meant to be enjoyed before adulthood strikes. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo |
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Saturday, May 30, 2009 @ 8:56 AM
a new cravingI'd to anything just to hold you in my arms I so badly want the Hey! Say! JUMP School Calendar April 2009-March 2010 and the NewS School Calendar April 2008-2009. NewS is out of stock when I checked the Internet. But Hey! Say! JUMP is still available. I plan to get my mom to pay for it with her credit card or someone who is able to help me order it off the Internest and I'll pay for it. I'm saving up approximately three bucks a day. Yes, it would take me about a month to collect the appropriate amount of money. I hope it doesn't go out of stock by then. That's if I buy it off the Internet. I'm not sure how much it will cost if I buy it here in Malaysia. I pray that they do have it in Kinokuniya. I'd be like a dream come true. If they had NewS' calender, it's be even better. So now, I need to save up three bucks a day. Everyday no matter what, I'd have to save three bucks. Whether I eat or not, I need to. Unless someone is willing to contribute at least a buck a week into my Japanese Idol Calendar fund. And hopefully, they have it in Kinokuniya. Someone buying for me will be even better. Details: Product name: Hey! Say! JUMP 2009 School Calendar April 2009-March 2010 Japan Version Artist: Hey! Say! JUMP Release date: 2009-03-03 Publisher: Shueisha Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo |
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@ 5:39 AM
Wishing that my eyes would stop craving for a sight of you Arashi's released three new songs. Out of three, two are ballads. And I'm instantly in love with them. Goes to say, Desiree Khuan Shern Lyn, is a sucker for ballads and cannot resist them. So, now the guys know what to woo me with. A serenade is all you need to win my heart. Figuratively, of course. I don't go down that easily. Unless you are a Japanese Johnny's Entertaiment member and holds a place close to my heart. Then be very sure I'll go rolling down the hill after you. And, I sing ballads the best. My voice doesn't crack easily Since I'm not a professional singer and neither do I have any singing ability. I just have a knack with remembering melodies. And ballads allow me to sing freely and drag my notes. Since I don't really have a good grasp on singing without chopping my words... I know it sounds weird but if you hear me sing, you'd probably understand. And my brain works better on ballads. Plus, ballad lyrics are extremely touching. And I'm a sucker for sweet nothings. I'm more emotional when it comes to ballads anyways. ~ I've been meaning to blog about this for quite long to get it off my back but what with the stupid computer being seriously sick and having to be taken to the hospital... It's not much of a hatred but an annoyance and discomfort as stated above to the person she is right now. Previously, she was different. At least to myself and another of the same party. She was bright. She was lovable. She was responsible. She stuck to her word. She helped out in group decisions. She never shouted, merely lectured. She never hated, only disliked. She looked carefree, now troubled. She was a friend. Now I've no idea who she is. She rarely speaks to me. And whenever she lectures on noise level, she fails to look at those surrounding her but never fails to SHOUT at the rest. Those surrounding her make the most noise whereas those who have minimal noise level get the full force of her annoyance. Where did the girl that I respected go? To the dark side? As quoted by another innocent bystander. I am civil to her but I wonder how long can I keep the facade before I give her the full force of a cold shoulder. On a certain current issue, she makes a vital decision in trying to get full participation from everyone but she hasn't made any move to carry out the decision. She decides but leaves the dirty work to the one who has since the beginning shouldered responsibility with her. And the one who shared the responsibility has begun to feel that the on going plan has become her sole responsibility. Much like the fable of the mice trying to put a bell on the cat. All suggestions but no action. She spends more time with others whom she deem more important rather than discussing about the plan and what we can do to make it work. She only talks about preparing the paperwork and how she knows the best way to do it because of her connections rather than about the real situtation at hand. Responsibility and participation in group decisions aside, attitude and personality wise: She has decidedly changed. For better or worse, I have no idea? It could be due to the load of work she might have And the stress caused by it But that is no reason to lash out unreasonably at those around her whom are less important to her. When I speak to her about a certain female, source of my hatred, she says that when I hate other people, other people might hate me too. I bet that when the other party speaks about those whom they hate, she wouldn't say this to them. No, she'd most likely just shut up or agree or be neutral. I know my word-twisting and trying to hide my intentions are much in vain since I don't have the wordplay skills of SweetMaeChan but I tried my best. Those of you who are even a little involved in this would know who I'm talking about. Those of you who aren't, I'm sure it isn't difficult for you to find out who I'm talking about. It's pretty easy actually but if you're going to ask me who, I'm ignoring all questions. Any questions on this is fine but name questions are going to be ignored. If anybody manages to figure out who I am speaking about, feel free to inform her about my feelings. I'm a coward to not say it to her face when she insults me downright since I care about the feelings of others unless they don't care about mine. But she held a place in my heart as a good friend and she finally lost the respect I used to have for her. And I still care for those whom I used to like. Feel free to inform her. I'll be happier. At least she knows that one person dislikes her when she's so "nice" that I don't think anyone can hate her. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo
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Friday, May 29, 2009 @ 2:30 AM
sinfully dreaming; a whole bunch of bare fleshSinfully wishing to touch that bare flesh, to kiss those nude lips Okay, I know LUST is one of the seven sins but when you constantly stare at boys stripping on Youtube, made into a concert DVD and sold in the market, it can't be helped. No...not pornography. I'm not that corrupted. And never would I succumb to those fake sex videos. Straying from my original topic. o.o Again on the topic of my Japanese idols... Again repeating on how I plan to get to them. Through either being their designer or through my story-writing. I plan to make my current story my biggest and best. My debut shall be spectacular. Also, I'm hoping to get signed to Johnny's and become their juniors. It's a start but that's how I'm going to work to the top. Again.... I've strayed. When Youtubers decide to upload videos of Japanese idols' concerts' behind the scenes, you'd get to see loads of bare flesh. And dreaming about the warmth when you touch it. The nude lips And nude as in make-up-less. How abundantly red they can be And how beautifully kissable. And how carefreely they flaunt their beautiful assests For all to squeal and see And dream and lust over. A dream come true would to be able to even make an accquaintance with them And not as a fangirl-idol relationship. sighs. no one would be able to understand the love I feel for them. xxx Jyaa Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo
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@ 1:14 AM
the beginning of an end; official enough? Sincerely wishing that you would take a look in my my direction and call my name SweetMaeChan calls for an official announcement of my return. Desiree Khuan Shern Lyn, owner of the blog http://www.infatuated-ribbonstreamers.blogspot.com/ will be returning after a long hiatus due to computer complications and the recent examinations. Now that the official announcement is out of the way; the holidays have officially begun. Filled with endless tuitions and the endless pile of homework covering floors, desks and even chairs What is the real meaning of holiday when we are still continuing with tuitions and homework? What is the point of the holiday break when we are still working our asses off to complete the work given and attend those mindless tuition classes? Isn't this a bit ridiculous? The holidays have never ever been a time of resting after the gruelling examinations. It was always a time for us to pile on homework and attend extra tuition classes. Special classes designed to fill up your holiday with work instead of rest. When will they ever learn? Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo P.S. Will be changing link again. Be prepared. Be very prepared.
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Thursday, May 28, 2009 @ 7:16 AM
am back for freaking good; finally in bliss Dying for a sight for you, to call my name, to wish for my existance Gosh! I'm finally back. I finally figured how to make it smaller! It was directly in front of my eyes but I was dumb enough not to have noticed it. Most would be welcoming the holidays But I'm actually dreading it. The day-to-day routine of going to school, not paying attention in classes and making a hell lot of noise is going to be interrupted. And not to mention, the giant pile of homework. Geography Not to mention the possibility of failing my KGT project because the woman who marks it claims that I have cheated by copying. Not only I but Wee Nee and Sin Yi whose folios I have never ever touched in my entire life. Of all people, you guys should know that they are merely accquaintances and I am not close to them at all so why should I copy their folios. These are mere accusations to find some loopholes to fail us. Just to fail one or two people so that the Jabatan won't suspect that our folios are so extremely perfect? Is that a valid reason to fail us? Let me tell you why she claims we copied: She based the copying issue on Kegiatan Ekonomi Bandaraya Petaling Jaya or something like that. My first sentence begins with: Kegiatan ekonomi utama Bandaraya Petaling Jaya ialah... How common is that sentence until she can claim we copied? Isn't this sentence absolutely common? Everyone uses it. No one would bother thinking up elaborate sentences. Second sentence: Terdapat beberapa perniagaan... Who wouldn't use terdapat beberapa perniagaan...? What kind of elaborate BM sentences does she want us to make? Furthermore, our sentences are all short so the difference in our sentences can't be seen. Hell, I've never ever seen Wee Nee and Sin Yi's folios before. This is unreasonable. So, if I fail my Geography for PMR, you people know who to blame. And I'm suing her. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo |
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@ 5:36 AM
another burst of shortness; bliss is still unattainableErm, another short post since my computer is still annoying the crap out of me and I'm still putting in all lost programs and files. Birthday was yesterday as most would know. It was simple. Wasn't elaborate. My appreciation and love goes out to all those who cared My sympathy to those who couldn't have given a damn about me but put on a facade for it. Thank you. My birthday was never celebrated but merely acknowledged with simple singing and a cake in the middle of the night. Never is it on a school day Always a holiday Thank you to all those who made the day special and for even acknowledging that it was the date of my birth. And the lone person who wished belatedly. And to all those who bothered to wish me even on Facebook Thank you Lydia, Nicholas, Nicole, Bue, Kishee...etc Who else who wished me... Thank you A million times thank you. My birthday has never been this awesome. Always it was merely a day come and gone. Now it was looked upon and some thought was given to it. And to two of my sayangs who gave me gifts It wasn't necessary but thank you anyways for thinking of it Mucholoveandappreciation, Lynxoxo |
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Wednesday, May 27, 2009 @ 8:41 AM
still a little frustration; bear itI'm technically still not back so please bear with me. I haven't even downloaded messenger into my computer. I need to go and locate Windows Update on my computer. Getting viruses into your computer is sucky. I've lost all my programs. The stupid font size of my computer is extremely giant and when I go and change it, it says that this is the smallest. I'm pissed off. My dad claims it will smallen in a while. Grr. No blogging serious issues till I feel comfortable with my computer. Bear with me. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo |
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Wednesday, May 20, 2009 @ 7:21 AM
no time for creative titles Sorry for the explosive return and the poofing out again. My computer as I discovered days ago when my blog first started dying is corrupted with a friggin virus which is affecting my IE and causing it to be extremely slow. So, no updates that frequently for the next few days while it goes for repair. And I'll be using my dad's computer for updates which I think I won't be able to because he's working on it half the time... Muchloveandappreciation, Lyn |
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Friday, May 15, 2009 @ 9:42 PM
dancing for all to see; waking up in vegas A little glitter and bad dancing sparkles 5 4 3 2 1 Bam! *explosionofglitterandcolouredsmoke* Okay forget it... My explosion back from the oblivion just sucks big time since blogger don't make my 1 any bigger than it normally would be. Grrr! I should html to do that but well, I'm too lazy. Currently trying my best not to cry as goosebumps break out on my skin as I watch with a heavyyethappy heart the Hey! Say! JUMP Jump-ing Tour. Last show in Yokohama arena on the 31st December. Everyone holds their concerts then. Even NewS did the same thing. ==' How are people going to go to both shows at once? I want so badly to watch a Johnny's Entertainment group concert, save for Arashi. Not a giant fan. That's my sister. Golf and Mike of Johnny's Entertaiment, SM Entertainment and the Thai talent agency, I can't remember the name is in Malaysia! Promoting their Chinese album. Goddamn I so want to go see them. It's not a concert but a conference, an interview with MyFM and a song or two in Sungei Wang today! T.T I'd die to go. Golf and Mike are uber sexy. But I still want to see either Hey! Say! JUMP, NewS or KAT-TUN but NewS is high on my list. ~ Away from the obsession with JEntertainment...Exams was sucky. We barely had time to study since the week before the examinations was folio week and nobody bothered to study since folios were more important than goddamned exams. Folios count for PMR. And I think for the first time in my entire life, I might get a B for English. And if not a B, a low A which is absolutely not up to my standards. Why? The question wasn't specific and SM and I of being creative minds, decided to stray away from the not-stated-idea and might end up failing the whole essay. Can you believe how painful that would be fore me? A B or a low A? It's heart-breaking. And I might just fail the rest of the exams since I didn't cram neither Geography nor Kemahiran Hidup, focusing mainly on History and I don't remember doing so well in that either. So was BM. I crapped my way through the essay at the end since I had no idea what to say and I was absolutely repetitive. Science was SHITT! I tembaked half my Paper 2 and sailed through Paper 1 rockily. So, I don't expect excellent results in school examinations but full A's for national examinations. Not that I expect to get into Sc1 or Sc2. I've opted to not do Pure Science and since I refuse to do BM Literature, I'm going to do Sub Science. Yay! But I'm still working for my 7A's. Oh and I've opted to participate in hosting Nose High School in Form 5 instead of Form 4 since in Form 4 it's just helping out. No worries, my dancing is still on. I'd wouldn't cancel that for the world. It's a passion. Covering my Japanese idols. But not dancing on my own since that is unfair and a little scary. In front of Japanese people and suddenly screwing it up(if I ever do screw it up), isn't very nice to our country's image. Bad enough we don't endorse them but we endorse Koreans. (bluegh!) Now all I have to do is guarentee myself a spot in the performance line-up for next year's Nose High and I'm all set to go. Throw around a little glitter and maybe if our dancing and singing sucks, we still shine! SHADOU? ~Rin-desu! Peasu no sign*~ Aishiteru minnasan.
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Saturday, May 9, 2009 @ 6:21 AM
frustrated; in blissbliss-landLost my heart and you found it I am so effing in love with Masuda Takahisa.With each smile, he takes my breath away With each whisper of his voice, my heart jumps With each glimpse into his eyes, I'm elated That darn boy makes my world go round I want NewS Colour album |
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@ 5:09 AM
birthday wishes one
first time I'm wishing anyone happy birthday on my blog so yeah... Happy Birthday Yamada Ryosuke of Hey! Say! JUMP I know he'd probably not read or ever see this but I do feel better wishing people happy birthday. Happy 16th on the 9th of May Lynxoxo
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Thursday, May 7, 2009 @ 5:08 AM
purely inside; slipups Falling in love under an umbrella has never been this wonderful I officially need a new camera. My current camera both my own Canon (don't know what ancient model) and the Sony Cybershot can't take awesome shots. Especially when taking landscape pictures. They always turn out blurr. Darn...I want a camera with anti-shake. And good videoing qualities. My camera's videoing sucks lolipops. And also a camera that takes good macro shots. Any takers? ~ Yesterday, my tuition teacher was like... Eh, you look very mature but your attitude like kebudak-budakan. Lawl...Is that true? I find that it is. Ahahaha. She said it because my brother was lying on the floor because he said he couldn't sit at the table and write. And when he wanted to get back up, he said he couldn't so I did this childish mime kinda of thing where I'm trying to get him back up.... Yeah... That's it. So, am I like kebudak-budakan? Lawl... ~ This is my favourite part of today's post. Technically, I'm cramming loads of things into one post since that's what I'm going to be doing for the next two weeks due to studying for the exams. This happened about I think about two days before. Sherwin was eating beehoon but everyone seems to call it as mee so well... Sherwin ShuHan There is nothing in this mee! No vegetables! There! Got tauge what. Yeah! Tauge and "mee" Get it? ahahahaha. Go figure and then laugh like mad. ~ Last topic. I'm on the borderline between liking DBSK and disliking DBSK. I'd probably like DBSK though I dislike following groups with tons of songs. it's damn difficult to keep up. sigh. And no, I don't like JaeJoong. I prefer Yunho. Leader of DBSK ~ Activity of the day: Answering the questions posted by adults to R.AGE. Go answer them. They're interesting. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo |
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Tuesday, May 5, 2009 @ 1:58 AM
crushcrushcrush; screaming in despair It's love and admiration all over again It's so darned annoying. Johnny and Associates don't accept girls. There's no mention anywhere that Johnny and Associates accepts girls. There was only once when they accepted girls and nothing happened. T.T Until today, there's no mention of them and until today, no females were accepted. Damn. I have to work extra hard to get myself in. Oh, I must get in! Firstly, I need to master my Japanese to be able to go in. *sighsdreamily* That is going to take ages. I'm going to concert/dance/sing cover every performance of NewS, KAT-TUN, Hey!Say! JUMP and Arashi there is. With a group who is as dedicated to them as I. Hopefully there are. ~ Right now, my Japanese idol is Keiichiro Koyama. No, not because he is hawt. Well, he is an that is a quarter of the reason. My crushes and sayangs still remain as Masuda Takahisa, Nakajima Yuto, Yamashita Tomohisa and Ueda Tatsuya. Well, KeiiKeii is my idol because that darn pretty face has got a Degree in Literature. Can you believe? He is the first of celebrities I know who has a degree in Literature. I'm forever in awe of him. My awe for him is so great that I think it overwhelms my sister's love for him. aaaaah. sigh. I so want to meet him someday. The only celebrity I know who's graduated with a Literature degree. Most of the time, they graduate with Architecture/Business/Law degree. I'm so in lurve... ~ Oh, btw Most Japanese stars go to college. In case you were wondering. They're not dumb blondes. In fact, they are stellar... With panas looks and education What more can a girl want? Now I have to wait for Nakajima Yuto to get into college. If not, it's byebye Yuto. I'm not in awe of celebrities who do not bother going into college. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo Studying in Meiji University is my current ultimate dream
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Monday, May 4, 2009 @ 6:51 AM
contradiction; a little appreciation would be nice This is an anger post.
So, don't read if you do not wish to. It's about someone. Someone whom my annoyance for has never been blogged about. It's always in my diary. So... Firstly, she ridicules everything I want to do. I said that I want to learn to cook. She said, "Don't cook today. I'm sure that you will ask me." As far as I'm concerned, I wouldn't ask for help because I want to be able to do it on my own. I don't want any help because that would totally kill the main purpose of me cooking on my own. But, no. She, as they say in Chinese "Die also want to help" and then say that I would ask for her help. I didn't ask whatsoever. She just came and butted in like that. It pisses me off that she simply judges a person by their past doings. Yeah, in the past I might have asked for help every single time. But hey, woman. I'm growing up here. When I did not say I want your help means that I really do not want it. If the food burns, then it shall burn. That's up to me. After all, it is my first time cooking. Can't be perfect. After all, you never allowed me to cook since I was young so there's no practice there. And don't go on and on saying I just saw how my mother did and then I learned from there. O.o I'm watching but I don't see anything worth learning. Learning is from experience, hear me? So, watching doesn't teach you anything, does it? So, stop ridiculing me each time. And whenever I scold my siblings because it was supposed to be group work of cleaning the house and they did nothing and when I asked them to do something, they just say no, I won't do it... She says...I know your character. Very lazy. Things you don't want to do, you ask people to do for you. Don't think I don't know your character. Hey..When she asks me to do things, I might complain and complain but I don't shove it to other people. So what if I'm lazy? At least I do it right? I've got other priorities in life besides hanging laundry and cleaning dishes. It's a little pissoffing to always find her scolding me for petty things that do not make a difference. Andyeah, I bet that if I told her I want to buy cloth to make my own clothes, she would laugh her head off at me and say, Don't ask me for help, aaah. I'm not going to help you aaah. OBVIOUSLY I KNOW THAT! That's the point of me wanting to do stuff. So that I learn to be independant and am able to survive. I did not ask for your help. There isn't any need to offer. So don't be nosy and but your head into things that do not concern you. If I didn't help means I don't want it. That's what the Internet is for anyways. I can learn from in Internet. In fact, half the things I learn are from the Internet. ><> And then she goes on to say that her friend who frequently makes sushi does not do it like that. I was really pissedoff. Nobody asked her for her help and she butted in and then started saying that isn't how you do it and she proceeds to help me. And then she says that I'm so dumb and useless. Can you feel how hurt I am? I'm just starting out learning how to cook. It's obvious I will make mistakes. Nobody's perfect. Can you see why I am not independant? Forces like this is holding me down. I TRY to even be independant. Muchappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo |
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@ 4:26 AM
fretting once more; eager to be done with all of uselessness The rest of the world awaits So, hantared Sejarah folio today. The last of my worries. What's bad was that when I came to school, I realised that I had left out a major part of my folio which is the interview parts. aaaaah! Went and photocopied them but aaaah! Bryan, our V.I. informant's name wasn't in my Kaedah and Penghargaan.. Why? Because in the first place, i didn't want to put his name there since I did not have the interview. So smart, the rest took from SM and my brother was using the computer when she was online so I didn't get a chance to ask from her. Darn it. In the end, after much regretting and not wanting to let go of my folio since I was very uncertain about unfinished parts, Sue Lynn snatched it out of my hand and gave it to Sherwin. End of half of my worries. The next segment of worries is the grading that I will get. I'm so afraid that I might score a B. I don't want to score a B. That would automatically kill my chances of getting an A no matter how much I study. *runsaroundlikelostpuppysquealingaboutnotgettinganA* I'm hoping with all my heart that I do not get a B. And well, today I've finally done my PLBS. After so long of waiting. If you all have heard my PLBS, most of you would know that it wasn't my original script. My original was on H!S!Jump! The purpose of me using that particular script that had nothing to do with any chapter in the book save for Chapter 4 which also has nothing much to do with it...was... To see the scorn and hatred and annoyance on HER face When teacher suddenly called my name out, I was devastated. The darn woman wasn't in class, helping out some TEACHER. IandSM were so disappointed. The reason I chose to do that particular PLBS was because I knew that she would look at me and roll her eyes in complete hatred. Sadly, the chance that I had was gone. Well, as Karen says, if it isn't meant to be, it isn't meant to be. Something else worse will come my way eventually. At least I'm over and done with my PLBS. Now time to go an study. Supposed to be studying at the moment but am downloading a file that takes more than an hour so I'm waiting. It's a NewS Shounen Club 090503 which is yesterday's episode. Couldn't understand a damned thing on the telly so decided to go scout for it on Youtube. Sadly, it's not there but my favourite subber has finally put it up. Hopefully, I manage to ace finals at the same time. With all those folios and lacking in studies, I wonder how anyone has anytime to even look at the textbook and self study. The teachers have no real timing and they throw everything to us so that they don't have more time later. Goes to show that they are freeeking lazy. And I can't believe we don't have trials. Back in primary school, I had a whole month of trials that I studied everyday and couldn't dream. When I don't dream means I'm super exhausted. Without trials, I've no idea how I'm going ace my tests. Muchappreciationandlove,
Lynxoxo |
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Sunday, May 3, 2009 @ 4:16 AM
retain the originality; there is a choice Choices exist but it's up to you to make it This has got to do with the Susan Boyle thing...Since everyone's making such a big fuss about and also because I'm a die hard fan. Her voice is Beeeyooooootiful. I'm in love with it. So, the current issue is whether she should get a makeover or not. And to me... She so f-ing should not get one. She would so freaking lose the charm that she had captivated her audience with. The charm of which a normal next door lady who lives with her cat can sing like a famous songstress and we mistook her for a normal lady based on appearances. Sadly, she had gotten a makeover and she no longer looks like the lady that had captivated the three judges on Britain's Got Talent. aaaaah! Why? Why? Why? Why does fame make people do things like this? If she wanted one so badly, why couldn't she before this? Fame is bad for health. Fame is bad for mental health. Generally although people craze for fame, it's bad for health. So there you have it. Don't be famous. After all, normal people are more famous than famous people. And they need us more than we need them anyways. Normal people batu! Be proud to being normal! Muchoappreciationandlove, Lynxoxo
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@ 2:57 AM
in the limelight; newer horizons Shining towards the future, burning the past along the way I've been meaning to post this for quite some time but I always forget to do so. =P Well, that's what happens when you've got two folios on your hand and one was given the wrong due date. Grrrr...!
LaSalle so damn lucky. Geo folio hantar on 7th May... Sejarah belum tahu when...Grrr Proves that our teachers are that lazy Or that they want to finish paper work first. I'll not agree with the latter and go with the former... Furthermore, the one who gave us the due date for Sejarah folio is nicely on maternity leave and she told us that the Sejarah folio is due AFTER school holidays...Can you see why we rushed to finish it? Grrrr... Rawr? That is random, I know. In my random mood at the moment. Listening to the same song over and over again. Staring at the same making-heart-painful boys. Aaaaah! ~ Oh yeah, back to my original idea before I forget again. If you do read the Science textbook, in Chapter 6, there is this one part about quicklime, I think that's the name that is really small. It says that quicklime was used once upon a time ago to light up the stages in theaters. Now we know why they use the term, in the limelight... Get it? I hope you do. ~ *intermissiontowatchYoutube* ~ Kokoro wa itai desu ne! I just watched my baby perform shirtless. Damn, he makes my heart clench so painfully. Massu-chan! I'll always be there for you. So, gambatte~! You have my full support. ~ A newer horizon. I'm going to start designing again. I'm sick of designing female clothes. It isn't challenging enough. I'm going to design boy clothes! Japanese-style. Erm, Johnny's Entertainment concert style. Over the top fluffy, girly, swirly clothing. ahahaha. Those clothes are the bomb. aaaaah! *nosebleedmoment* They so compliment the skinny figure of the Japanese boys. sigh. clothes are love. ~ One last subject. I'm back to putting those italic stuff after the title. They have nothing to do with the post whatsoever and is there for my random amusement. Just trying to see how fast I can come up with those kind of lines. Muchloveandappreciation, Lynxoxo |
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Saturday, May 2, 2009 @ 10:24 AM
sighing in relief; the first scare is almost overshort post, baybeh. Well since Geography folio was hantar-ed last week, nothing to worry about except for maybe.... I don't know... Say... Getting a B! Aaaaaah! Freakout! Geo isn't so bad since it was practically spoon-fed to us. Now, Sejarah folio is one to worry about. I practically crapped my whole way through the essay and rumusan. I barely knew what I wanted to say and without my translaters around, doomsday! I suck with my BM translations so that's like the source of my problems. Well, over now since I'm finally done with my Sejarah folio. Phew! *sighofrelief* Now it's just the fretting of getting a B. Two Bs and 4Sc1/4Sc2 can be kissed byebye. Praying hard that it doesn't score a B. |
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@ 9:53 AM
let me hold and love you; nii-san! My infatuation for you runs deep I freaking can't get his face out of my head. Maybe I should revert back to my old skin with the marquee of 'infatuated at the sight of you; lips&eyes&smile :)'. It would be so true at the moment. Anything to do with him makes my heart clench and my spirits soar. Hell, he's the first dude to find his way into my wallet. I have never been that desperate. Ahhhh, it's so painful! Itai ne! Hontou ni itai! I feel like crying. My heart hurts so much with wanting to hold him in my arms and just snuggle. It's hard to watch from a distance and not be near him. Although he's 8 years my senior, I can't help but be infatuated. It's uncontrollable. It seriously hurts so bad. Is this what you call being a little blonde princess? The need to be near not only him but all of them is great. It's drugging to the mind. My brain runs on only one course and that is the helpless infatuation. The one reason why my heart still beats. The one reason I would give anything to return to Japan. The one reason I am working so hard to complete my latest book. The one reason I endorse anything Japanese. The one reason I Youtube. The one reason I can't sleep at night. (this one's not true) Sigh. Please notice me, my dearest fantasy. Look my way and pick me up Massu-chan
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Friday, May 1, 2009 @ 1:02 AM
dokidoki at the sight of you; a new horizonI hate the fact that my stupid blogskin makes all my posts centralized if I centralize one part only. And I'm too lazy to go find the source of it's stupidity. My heart goes dokidoki again at the sight of my NewS sayangs. It's hard to decide on either YamaPi or Masuda. Both makes my heart clench and my lips involuntarily curl into a smile. So does Ryo Nishikido and Tegoshi Yuya. And psst, don't tell my sister. So does Koyama Keiichiro. My newest NewS obession is the song 'SNOW EXPRESS' from their 'Colour/Color' (however you wish to spell it) album. The song is awesome. The dancing is awesome. Mainly, everything's awesome. In my opinion, at least. My sister refuses to agree. I'm sure you'll side my sister. Since NO ONE ELSE BOTHERS LISTENING TO JAPANESE MUSIC! Anyways, here's the non-lyricsandsubbed version. Enjoy. dokidokiatthesightofyou. YamaPiandMasudaisLove Muchloveandappreciation, Lynxoxo |